- Lead time:
- three evenings, and weeks to let it sink in
- Costs:
- none
With this step you decide together whether it's going to be Finland. You
end up with a few conditions on paper that you both stand behind.
Going alone? Then have this conversation with the people you leave behind.
The questions below work for them too.
Take three evenings. One conversation is too short for a decision like
this. Agree on three evenings, with a week in between:
- Evening 1, why. What do we hope to find in Finland? What are we leaving behind here? Would that really be different there?
- Evening 2, what we give up. Who and what will we miss? What are we dreading most? What do we do if it disappoints?
- Evening 3, the conditions. What has to be arranged for each of us to say yes? When do we check together whether it's going well, for example after six and after twelve months? And what would be a reason for us to go back?
Write the conditions down. On the kitchen-table card it all fits on one A4
sheet.
Finland has scored as the happiest country in the world for years. Still,
it comes with two things that need to be on the table:
- The light. The winter is long, dark and colder than the Swedish one. Even in Helsinki there are January days of -20 °C.
- The distance. A quick trip back to the Netherlands is a flight or well over a day on the ferry, not a car ride.
Divide the work. Agree who takes on which part of this plan: the
papers, the house and the cancellations, the school, the move. That way
not one of you carries everything. Invite your partner into your plan;
then you can both see what's done.
Is one of you going without an income of your own? Whoever lives in
Finland and doesn't work in the Netherlands usually no longer builds up
AOW. For every year you're not insured, you later get 2 percent less AOW.
From the moment you're no longer insured, you have one year to take out
voluntary insurance with the SVB. Also discuss who carries the income in
the first months, whether the partner without an income keeps an account
and money of their own, and how you decide together on big expenses.
Married, registered or living together? It can make a difference for
your partner's residence permit, for co-insurance in healthcare and for
inheritance. If you're both Dutch, each of you lives in Finland in your
own right. If your partner has a nationality from outside the EU, they
live there as your family member. If they stay longer than three months,
they get a residence card of their own. A spouse always counts as a family
member, a registered partner if Finland treats that partnership as
equivalent to marriage. If you live together unmarried, you prove a
durable relationship and Finland assesses it itself. Check at your
healthcare further on in your plan what else applies to you.
Are children coming? How you tell them depends on their age:
- Up to about four: tell them shortly before the move and keep fixed habits, like the bedtime ritual and the cuddly toy in the hand luggage.
- Primary school: tell them well in advance and let them look along: photos of the school, the neighbourhood and the house. Let them choose something, like their room.
- Teenagers: involve them in the decision itself. For them, saying goodbye to friends weighs heaviest. Agree how they keep in touch and when they see their friends again.
For children who don't yet speak Finnish or Swedish, the municipality can
offer a preparatory class. That's not an obligation. Ask the municipality
where you're going to live, before you choose a home.
Who learns the language, and when? Finnish is not a Germanic language,
and it grows on you slowly. Outside the ICT and tech sector in the
Helsinki region, Finnish is the working language almost everywhere. On the
coast that can also be Swedish. Often the partner without work needs the
language most, and precisely that partner has no colleagues to practise
with. Plan it together, preferably before you leave.