- Lead time:
- three evenings, and weeks to let it sink in
- Costs:
- none
This step makes sure the whole family knows what changes, and stands
behind it. The pitfall of Belgium is that it doesn't look like a
pitfall. Family stays within driving distance and the language stays
yours.
Going alone? Then have this conversation with the people you leave
behind. The questions below work for them too.
Take three evenings. One conversation is too short for a decision like
this. Agree on three evenings, a week apart:
- Evening 1, why. What do we hope to find in Belgium? What are we leaving behind here? Would that really be different there?
- Evening 2, what we give up. Who and what will we miss? What are we dreading most? What do we do if it disappoints?
- Evening 3, the conditions. What has to be in place for each of us to say yes? When do we check together whether it's going well, for example after six and after twelve months? And what would be a reason for us to go back?
Write the conditions down. On the kitchen-table card it all fits on one
A4.
On those evenings, discuss precisely what does change:
- Whoever goes to work in Belgium has hardly any accrued holidays in year one. The system accrues your holiday in the previous year.
- Social life really does move with you. A Dutch person in Belgium lives close by. But they are administratively, fiscally and in the long run also emotionally an emigrant there.
Say that honestly. It prevents the quiet disappointment of year two.
Divide the work. Agree who takes on which part of this plan: the
papers, the house and the cancellations, the school, the move. That way
not one of you carries everything. Invite your partner into your plan;
then you both see what's done.
Is one of you going without an income of your own? Whoever lives in
Belgium and doesn't work in the Netherlands usually no longer builds up
AOW, the Dutch state pension. For every year you're not insured, you later
get 2 percent less AOW. You can insure yourself voluntarily with the SVB.
You have one year for that, counted from the moment you're no longer
insured. Also discuss whether that partner keeps an account and money of
their own, and how you decide together on large expenses.
Married, registered or living together? That can make a difference for
your partner's residence permit, for co-insurance in healthcare and for
inheritance. Check at your registration with the municipality and at your
healthcare further on in your plan what applies to you.
Are children coming? How you tell them depends on their age:
- Up to about four. Tell them shortly before the move and keep fixed routines, such as the bedtime ritual and the cuddly toy in the hand luggage.
- Primary school. Tell them well in advance and let them look along: photos of the school, the neighbourhood and the house. Let them choose something, such as their room.
- Teenagers. Involve them in the decision itself. For them, saying goodbye to friends weighs the most. Agree how they keep in touch and when they'll see their friends again.
The children switch school systems. In Antwerp, Ghent and Brussels you
enrol them digitally, within fixed periods. Whoever is late misses out at
the popular schools. How that enrolment works is in the article about
school with this step.
Who learns the language, and when? In Flanders you already speak the
language. But the administrative language differs per region: if you
choose Brussels or Wallonia, you'll deal with French too. Often the
partner without work needs the language most, and that's exactly the one
without colleagues to practise with. Plan it together, preferably before
you leave.